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Saving the World Through Typing
©2003, by Holly Lisle
All Rights Reserved
So you're a writer, and you want to use your writing as your vehicle
to save the world.
Can I talk you out of that?
I know all sorts of writers. I know Earnest Craftsmen, who are forever
looking for a better way to tell their stories; Obsessed Lunatics, who
put writing right after breathing and considerably ahead of eating or
going to the bathroom; Tortured Idealists, who have survived something
tough, and who are determined to get their experiences on paper so someone
out there might read what they've written and escape the same fate; and
Exuberant Talesmiths, who are forever bounding into view shouting, "You
won't BELIEVE the idea I just had!"
Then there are the other sorts. The Scam-Artist Writers, who write things
they have no respect for while publishing this self-described dreck regularly,
who sit around muttering, "I can't believe those suckers paid money
for that". The Pain-In-The-Ass Artistes, who throw tantrums when
editors suggest that their words might be less than perfect. And the worst
of the lot, the Writing Superheroes, whose self-declared goal is to change
the world through typing.
And you may be saying, "Wait a minute. I was with you right up until
that last one -- but what's wrong with wanting to change the world with
my writing?
Let's look at the big picture first: the Whole World picture. The last
guy who really changed the world -- the whole world -- with his writing
was Karl Marx, who had the unfortunate idea, based not on real- life experience
but on theory, that we would all be better off if people were forced to
share. Along came some folks who read his work, agreed with him, and thought
they would like give his theory a test run -- from the position of Person
Forcing Others To Share, mind you, not from the position of Person Being
Forced To Share. They carried Karl's half-baked theory into the real world.
Horror ensued: mass slaughter, war, totalitarianism, annihilation of
human rights, and the impoverishment of whole nations. There are folks
who will read this and scream, "But the people who tried out his
theories misinterpreted his words." Maybe. That does not change the
fact that he had a fundamentally bad idea, he decided to gift all of us
by writing it down -- and that no matter which way you interpret the theories
of Karl Marx, bad things are going to happen.
More big picture. Let's look at the authors of the four Gospels of Jesus
Christ, and Paul of Tarsus and his preachy letters; Mohammed and the Koran;
Joseph Smith and his mysterious vanishing stack of gold tablets; L. Ron
Hubbard and Dianetics. The first two are genuine big-picture,
the second two are big-picture wannabes. Nonetheless, these writers have
changed the world. The Gospels and the Koran between them have been responsible
for everything from hot-lead enemas and daughter- drownings and witch
roasts and ripping people apart with horses, to war, to torture, to genocide,
to infanticide, to the stripping of basic human rights from whole genders
and classes and races of people. And people acting on these writings continue
to screw up the world today. People are still being tortured and slaughtered
and imprisoned and executed and oppressed, based on the dictates of these
written works and the interpretations of nutcases who believe them and want to force others to believe them (willingness to use force being the way you define "nutcase" in this instance).
To a lesser extent, the L. Ron Hubbard and Joseph Smith works are guilty
of crimes just as vile, and they would both be much worse if they were
bigger.
If you're inclined to say, "Yes, but so much good has come of these
works," I simply counter, "Is there any way we can have the
Pieta and Chartres and the Ode to Joy and people loving
their neighbors, and just skip the iron maidens and the rack and the slaughter
of Jews, slavery, the Crusades, 1400 years of perpetual jihad, and other oppressive, evil goodies?" Because
the bad is out there, and it is terrible almost beyond imagining. And
the bad is as much a direct result of readers acting on the words of writers
as the good. You don't get to claim one and pretend the other didn't happen.
About the best thing you can say about Genghis Khan is that he didn't
write a book.
Still want to save the world through typing?
Let's do a Superhero Writer Sniff Test, then, and see
if you're qualified.
Start by giving yourself ten points, and honestly answer the questions
below.
1. -- Have you ever successfully saved civilization before?
If NO, subtract one point and move to question two.
If YES, answer questions 1A-1E.
1A. -- Have wars or human rights violations occurred as
either primary or secondary fallout from your intervention?
If YES, subtract ten points and go away. Sucking at your job the first
time around does not qualify you to receive a second opportunity to
screw up people's lives.
If NO, keep going.
1B. Has anyone ever killed anyone else in your name?
If YES, answer subquestion IB-i.
If NO, skip to question 1C.
IB-i. Do you think having someone killed in your name or based on your
precepts was an appropriate action?
If YES, subtract ten points and go away. We're up to our asses in zealots
already.
If NO, (in other words, if your words were misinterpreted), subtract
eight points. If you can't write words that can't be misinterpreted
in such a way that they result in fatalities, why do you think you're
qualified to save civilization? Go to question 1C.
1C. Does your current plan for saving the world involve IN ANY WAY using
force to change the minds of those who disagree with you, or require a
majority of the world's population to follow your plan for it to succeed?
If YES, subtract ten points (or all remaining points) and go away.
We have no job openings for the creators of dictators.
If NO, go to question 1D.
1D. Does your plan for saving the world discriminate based on race,
creed, gender, sexual orientation, philosophy, handicap status, or in
any other way?
If YES, subtract ten points, (or all remaining points). Only equal-opportunity
saviors need apply.
If NO, go to question 1E.
1E. What is your plan?
Type it out in appropriate manuscript format.
If you have less than five points, burn the manuscript and hit your
head against a wall until you forget what you wrote. It's a bad idea.
If you have five or more points, but less than ten points, put the
manuscript in a drawer and forget about it. Maybe someday someone will
come along and find your manuscript and do something worthwhile with
it that won't result in disaster.
If you still have all ten points, go ahead and submit your manuscript
to publishers until one of them agrees to take it on, and then wait.
Once it's on the shelves, maybe we'll decide to shell out the bucks
to buy it, and if we like it, and if we decide we like it enough to
actually change our lives based on what you've written, maybe we'll
get back to you in fifty or a hundred years.
2. If your plan to save the world through typing is not based upon successful
world-saving experience, upon what is it based?
A. My written works have single-handedly saved an entire race or nation
from disaster.
Subtract one point for not having saved the whole world, and go answer
questions 1A-1E.
B. My written works were responsible for the elimination of the national
debt, poverty, or world hunger.
Subtract five points for having dealt with only one very limited issue,
and go answer questions 1A-1E.
C. I am or have been leader of a first-world nation.
Subtract ten points and go away. You didn't save the world through
action, sucker -- there's no WAY your writing is going to do the trick.
D. I have no relevant job experience. All I have is a wild-ass theory
that I think would work and that I would like my readers to force down
the throats of unsuspecting world populations.
Can you ... uh ... pass this theory on to the FBI, the CIA, and maybe
Interpol, and title it “My Plan to Save Civilization”, and
then ... um ... go stand in a dark alley in a crime-ridden neighborhood
and try out your theory on the folks there? No?
Then subtract ten points for sheer idiocy, and ten more points for
callous disregard for your fellow humans and their rights, and take
a sledgehammer to your computer before you hurt someone.
E. I have decided that I really don't want to save the world through
typing.
THANK YOU! Oh, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Subtract ten
points -- you didn't want them anyway. Pick up your NotSavingTheWorld
pip if you're a member of the Forward Motion Community, and wear it
proudly. Then go write something wonderful that we can read and enjoy.
Writing to change the world, alter civilization, or save humanity are
bad, bad goals. However, writing to pass on your own experiences is life-affirming,
and can let you make the world a better place for those few of your readers
who WANT to have their lives changed. When you're writing from experience,
you will manage to reach people who needed to read what you wrote, who
were looking for answers, and who found them in your words. You will be
a candle making your corner of the world brighter. And you won't have
to get up every day, put on your superhero tights, and trudge off to carry
the future of civilization on your shoulders. Nor will you turn into a
pompous ass while carrying it.
And thank you for that, too.
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